Because Bart's computer is too innocent to have porn...

...so I wrote it for him! Yuusuke/Lee and Sakura/Chizuru/Bart. Yes, I mean it on the last one.


"Stop squirmin' man," Yuusuke hissed, trying his best to restrain Rock Lee who was most determined to elude him. "Trust me on this."

"You say that, but you're the one who's holding me down by your legs," the Konoha ninja retorted plaintively. A soft exhalation came out from his mouth, quite unexpected from someone who could run 500 laps without effort. And for a second Yuusuke thought maybe he was pressing a little to hard on him.

But no, things had to be done. It was for Sakura's sake. If they were going to live as husband and wife and husband...and husband. Yes, it had to be done. Yuusuke made a face as he gripped the shaft, already slick and wet, letting it drip into his hands.

"No, I've changed my-" Lee whimpered.

"Sakura."

"But-!"

"It's for Sakura."

And instantly Lee's hesitation vanished, replaced by a burning determination to please Sakura as he lowered his head obediently.

Yuusuke relaxed at the sudden compliance, breathing easier now that the hard part was over. He quickly jabbed the hair gel through Lee's bowl cut and stood up, admiring his handiwork.

"Heh, you don't look so bad now that I can see your forehead, buddy."



This was going to take all of her cunning, all of her wiles, all of her experience and that fourth level dan in grope-fu to get it to work. As well as a paperclip, some rope, gum and whatever else it took that eighties MacGuyver guy to build a bomb. A love bomb.

Chizuru had to admit most of it was sadism. There was something about Sakura she enjoyed prodding, Bart could certainly push her buttons. And maybe the love goop feelings she had for Bart wasn't totally off base. Especially if his inclusion meant lots of good vibrations, if you know what she was thinking about.

But the problem was how. Option one, bean Bart in the head and tell him he's Sasuke. Again. Only problem was that Sakura wouldn't stand for it. And forget lying down then.

Option two, tell Bart there was a bomb lodged deep inside Sakura and she didn't know. There were other snafus in that scenario, namely an irate ninja and a traumatized superhero.

That only left option three take matters into her own hands. Hands that held rope and could unhitch a bra faster than Impulse could blink. This could work.

"I'll kill you when I get free you little pervert!" Sakura screamed at Bart even as he tried to inch away from her, but to no avail. Apparently Chizuru's pheremones were so thick all of his vibrating couldn't free them.

"But I didn't dooooooooooooo anything," Bart whined. "I just wanted to help escape. I don't wanna look at your chest!"

"What's wrong with my chest?!"

Chizuru smirked, things were going exactly according to plan. "I have no idea, it's a mighty fine chest."

"Thank you-wait, I'm going to kill you too!"

"Don't kill Chizuru!" Bart piped up.

"I'll kill you first and then kill her so you don't find out," Sakura seethed.

"But you just told me so I'll know you'll try and-" Bart pouted. "Can't we all get along?"

"If you think I'm going to get along with a groping pervert and an underwear theif, you're out of your mind!"

Chizuru whistled nonchalantly. "What underwear?"

"What do you mean what-" realization dawned and Sakura immediately closed her legs as best she could since she was tied up faster than Chisame's tongue mentioning Utena. "BART! YOU DAMN UNDERWEAR STEALER!"

"IT WASN'T ME, I-" Bart blinked, shifting in his one piece spandex uniform. "Waitaminute...my Spider-Man boxers, they're gone? I didn't even notice." He gazed at Chizuru with a newfound appreciation. "Wow, I didn't even notice and-"

With powers like that, Chizuru knew her speed reflexes on their virginity was only a snap of her fingers away.